Navigating a relationship with a manager you perceive as ineffective or unqualified can be frustrating. But letting those feelings fester can impact your reputation, productivity, and well-being. Here are steps you can take to shift the dynamic.

Reflect on what’s really bothering you. Is it a disagreement over tasks, or a misalignment in values? Sometimes, it’s not about your manager’s competency but rather your own expectations and responses.

Take ownership of your part in the relationship. Consider how actions like disengaging or reacting defensively might contribute to the strain. Think about what this resistance might be costing you in terms of personal growth and team harmony.

Align your approach with your values. If transparency matters to you but feels absent in your working relationship, explore how you can model this value in your behavior—even if it’s not fully reciprocated by your boss.

Open a dialogue. Consider initiating a positive conversation, expressing a desire to strengthen collaboration and align on expectations. Simple questions like “How can we support each other better?” or “What priorities should I focus on?” can foster a clearer understanding of expectations and build a more constructive relationship.
This tip is adapted from “When Your Manager Is Ineffective—and You Feel Stuck,” by Sarah Mann and Luis Velasquez.
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