Have you ever felt undermined by a colleague in a meeting? It can be difficult to know how to cope when your coworker interrupts you, makes a snide remark, or shoots down your idea in front of others. Here are some strategies that can help you move forward productively. 

1. Consider your own behavior. Ask yourself: Am I creating tension on the team—unintentionally? What can I do to set a positive tone in team meetings? How can I be a more encouraging and supportive colleague?

2. Model how to reframe feedback. One way to influence an overly negative colleague is to model constructive criticism. Follow any critical comment with “but” or “and” statements. For example, you might say: “This project timeline is risky and may miss the original deadline—but if we build in the proper contingencies, we should still be on target to accomplish our goals.”

3. Check in with your manager. Gauge your boss’s perspective on the team’s dynamics to make sure your interpretation is accurate.

4. Seek internal validation. Being criticized can lead you to feel insecure or defensive. And while it’s natural to seek validation from others when your confidence is shaken, it’s also important to validate yourself. You can do this by learning new skills, attending conferences, volunteering to help others, or taking on a stretch goal that will push you out of your comfort zone.
This tip is adapted from “When a Coworker Undermines You in a Meeting,”by Susan Peppercorn

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