When your team blames you for a failure or a decision they don’t like, it’s natural to feel a range of uncomfortable emotions. How can you work through your response and rebuild trust?
 
Be brutally honest with yourself. Start by identifying and naming your feelings, then take an honest look at your contributions to the situation. Ask yourself, “What did I do—or not do—that contributed to these circumstances?” Regardless of whether you deserve blame, avoid defensiveness. Instead, give yourself grace.
 
Listen to and validate your team. Schedule a meeting to address their concerns, and do your best to be empathetic. You might say, “I heard your concerns and want to understand your perspective.” Give them your undivided attention, ask open-ended questions, mirror back what you hear, and adopt an open and nonjudgmental attitude. When it’s appropriate, own up to your mistakes.
 
Finally, work together to find solutions to ensure the problem doesn’t happen again. A collective approach will help rebuild trust between you and your team.
This tip is adapted from “What to Do When Your Team Blames You,” by Dina Denham Smith and Ron Carucci

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